Posts Tagged ‘Destiny’

There are times in one’s life that their destiny is staring at them directly. This has been happening to me for some time now, yet I am a master of self delusion when it comes to facing my spiritual destiny. The delusion comes in the form of creating distractions to hide, more like attempt to hide, the very powerful message that is slapping me in the face. A lot of this delusion comes from fear of accepting me as the Self.  There is a deep fear that I am not worthy of the honor of the manifestation of my spirit in my material form. Of course this is totally unfounded as the Self has chosen this form and this time to bring about the work that spirit needs to do.

So what are the chains that are holding me in myself imposed prison? The first thing that comes to mind is the continual conditioning of society that states that you should not be thinking about these higher ideals. You are a person that makes mistakes and you are neither an enlightened being nor a master in physical form so it is impossible for you to attempt this lofty goal of embracing the Self. Another link in the chains of self imprisonment is what I went through being a very sensitive child in a large family. This was very overwhelming to me as I had no idea how to process all the emotions and social interactions that were going on. It is this point of being emotionally overwhelmed that really hits the mark.  As I write this entry of self discovery, I now understand that this is the base, the foundation, of what I fear. The over load of emotions that crashes down on me as a wave would crash into the rocks. In a way I feel like that rock, yet as the wave pass it remains. An exciting answer to my problem is to be like that rock. Let the emotion crash over you and feel that emotion yet remember that you are founded in Spirit and no emotion can change that.  When that is remembered then I cannot be washed away.

 I would very much like to thank my wonderful wife Gabriele. Your insights yesterday have helped to look at myself and embrace what I am. I love you very much and I appreciate your wisdom and personal insights.

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